BE SMITE by the MIGHTOFRYAN

2009-12-31T07:46:00.000-08:00

31-12-09

This day marks an end to year 2009. 28 years old for that is. At the same time it meant a new beginning. It has something to do with a movie, "AVATAR". There was this scene, where the hero (Jake Sully) of the show receive this new mission, in riding Toruk ( The orange, tiger striped flying creature ) " take it to the next level.

Then after the show, I went home and saw this giant billboard. It said the same thing. " Take it to the next level". For now I'm extremely sure that I felt my calling. On my way home, it was constantly calling me to bring myself to the next act.

Act 2 ( Part of my filmmaking Journey )

Speaking of this..... I reviewed briefly on all the goals I set.

90% achieved. 10% unaccomplished - What are they?
1) I postponed the short film.
2) I couldnt get what I was so infatuated over the last 5 months.
3) 2 years have passed, I made a promise to someone that I would achieve certain success. But instead I steered towards my dream and forsaking the chance to get rich. So be it.

Somehow this calling..... or maybe it was my sub-conscious mind. It gave me a requirement, whether I was willing to forsake it for a year. My answer is Yes.

So, Brand new 2010 Here I come. Oh wait, I'm hearing distant firework sounds, or was it the thunderous night rumbling away.

But my new goal. A feature film for 2010. Time for this hero" Ryan" to get into his act2. I'm Ready Now!

2009-12-04T08:19:00.000-08:00

Teleportation

That is what my mind has been doing all over the place. The Vibes I feel, its pretty hard to unfocus at times. Especially times when u start sleeping and the dream world invades, I haven't been sleeping well at night.

My mind is so exhausted because you have been running all over in my head, simply becoz I just couldn't have the chance to rest.

You are so special.

2012

2009-11-17T09:57:00.000-08:00

A Disaster Movie 2012 ( How about a prediction for a 4 D )

Indeed~ Why do people keep thinking about dying , end of world? Why did they not see birth or a new goal. I felt disappointed coz the Act 2 of the story made u wanna believe that they created "Spaceship" instead of ship. Anyway that's a personal view.

Suddenly A thought popped into my mind while watching the credits. I thought of someone throughout the show. You said something about " You'd settled for what comes along", but I won't. Whether or not what's mine and what's not, I'm gonna fight for what I want. Should the tsunami goes more than 3,000 ft high or even a 20 pointer earthquake happens. My decision for my path is clear and absolute. "I will not settle for less, I hope the same goes for you".

Believe it or not, I remembered the things you said, the way you felt, the way you reacted, the way you got angry, the path you want to go.

Falling In love Again

2009-10-17T08:16:00.001-07:00

"The Ugly Truth"

I watched this movie, I find myself very much alike Gerard Butler. Weeks later I simply forgotten about what this show. Until I heard someone said," I see so much of myself in Katherine Heigl" and she has seen the show 3 times.

Suddenly my forehead felt warm... Its like a South Meeting North Pole of a magnet... I'm glad after all these episodes. There is just Something about her that attracts me so much. This kind of attraction is so unlike before.

You appeared in my dreams.....from what I recalled, I rejected you in the dream. Some signs of how resolved I'm right now. I done with your chapter and I'm glad I'm Falling in love again.

WOW wow WOW

2009-09-26T04:59:00.001-07:00

Been ages since I last Post... 1 Piece of Good News & 1 fantastic love story

Good News
My show reels are being examined by Executive ProducerS of Okto and I'm awaiting response to get a job or something, however that's uncertain.

Better than nothing but it shows I'm moving.

Fantastic Love Story ( gonna be long, so sit tight and enjoy the reading as I have enjoyed dreaming it)

This story involves a little boy (ME of coz) & girl ( you won't believe, i will place the pic below) who are orphans and sick with some form of incurable disease. Both of us shared a childhood together and till 20s. I was infatuated with her since teenage, but we lost contact over time and soon we began to go our ways. A pity that I didn't confess my feelings.

I became a doctor researching on curing disease ( her disease) and as I grew matured and older, symptoms of my illness went away. So there was this dinner gala held by the society of above "specialist" doctors. I went and I found her at last.... with her boyfriend though.. and this is how she looks like, she still look as fair as ever.

So of coz I approach her and we began to catchup on good "O" times which I couldn't think of any. I began to realized she is just dating or the sake of dating. However her illness still remains and of my research for curing that illness advanced no further. I began to think of ways to cheer her up since I knew her for a long time. I found out she loves painting and sculpting and thus I began taking some lessons on it without her knowing. Then I forsake every material and riches which I have earned throughout as a doctor and also I began to love these arts over the time and I became master like.

We enjoyed our time together and once I tried to hold her hands but she pushed it off and started off with a different topic, I began to wonder. Several times this type of incident repeated and I slowly got demoralized and I got myself wasted on alcohol. My body wasn't able to take it and the illness came back. I stopped but it was too late, and at the same time she became sicker and she couldn't get out of her house.

I began to spend my time at home leaving the career behind as I knew my days were close. I began paint many portraits and it had a STORYBOARD like feel of my affections to her since teenage. I completed that and I was gonna work on my sculpting of her. I was rushing my work before her time was up.

One day I forgot to leave the gates of the house close and at the same time she decided to visit me, and I couldnt hide all the items in time. She realized the painting and was completely amazed. Once again, I tried to hold her hands she rejected again and this time I told her right in the face how much I have love her since young. Both of us broke into tears and I could tell she was holding onto "thing". Next I cough blood, and it showed how bad health was... and then she spoke,"I'm so sorry, why I rejected you so many times is because I love you". She continued further," because I'm dying and I left a month or 2 to go and I don't want you to bear that kind of grief."

I pulled her to the room where the sculpting of her image was at, next I knew we both held each other and sat down. Moments later.............. that was when I woke up

( who dies next or live, you decide)

THE GIRL IS ..... Lin Chi Ling haha

2009-03-23T07:41:00.000-07:00

Trying to move on

Please let me move on, its been ten months already... maybe its my own weakness that resulted in this. Your name keep reappearing out of nowhere, I tried so hard to pretend that you didn't matter anymore. I kept going on dates but it didn't help...

Perhaps I was the only left withering in solace of last winter. I realized I'm nothing but a hollow vessel and there is this frightened kid screaming for help so that he can heal from those very wounds u left.

What else can I do now?

Good News & Bad News

2009-03-13T09:47:00.000-07:00

Finally time to share wassup with me. Been busy doing a short film with mdis peeps for a video competition. Lots of experience gathered, it was sure a invaluable one.

Good News
Honestly I dont know if it even counts as one. For the 1st time in my life, I diverted my attention of gaming, unsuccessful womanizing, slacking towards film making. Nothing fervored me like this before. I wish i'm more financially supported in this.

Bad News
I found out that 2 person.....in school contact me for some reason. Whether to go out or just talk, it freakin made me pissed OR wondered. DID U "COMMUNICATE" with me just to vent frustration or boredom then brush me off like a tick when u don't need my ENTERTAINMENT. Why am I so pissed? I just try to be a nice guy sometimes and it seems like when I need to be entertain...... you two just don't even bother to find out why I sms or called.

Is it just me being petty or do I think too much. If I didn't made my "calling" clear enough. FUCK MYSELF but if its true.

FUCK U & FUCK UR ATTITUDE, FUCKERS!

A Great Adventure

2009-02-01T09:23:00.000-08:00

Most of the time, I have odd dreams. However this time, it was so seemingly real & logical. Laugh all you want but this is how it went......

I went with a group of Caucasians in a wooden cabin and to my horror they were like having orgies and I was quite disgusted with facial expression walking out when I found their activities. At the same time from another door, another very pretty asian girl walked out with same expression as I carried. She was very beautiful which I couldn't really describe, long smooth silky black hair, tan glowing skin, fine features with demure look. At that split moment we fell in love ( haha, why ? I do not know.) We started getting into courting actions only.

I think this part took place in a medieval age.

As we developed further, I was introduced to her father who was impressed with me for some brave actions in saving some of the people of his country during a flood. Yes he was the king of that country and then I realized the girl was the princess and to make matters worse...... An enemy of my country. You see, I was a captain of my own country and slowly the king found out my origins and declared me to be arrested or killed at sight.

I wore my plate armor and stole a horse and road back towards my border of the country. ( both countries were separated by a river and the only path was to run through a huge wooden draw bridge. Armies were behind me chasing and she was also with the army pleading the king to stop. I had an arrow stuck on my back and several arrows and spears whizzed pass my head. At the very moment, I turned my head back and a tear fell from my eye. When I reached safety, I was terribly wounded.

Several years later I decided to lead a conquest to enter the country and with hopes of her still waiting for me. ( this part i saw a glow in my eye, anticipating with passion )

Awkward

2009-01-21T09:46:00.000-08:00

Maybe Its just me thinking too much, seldom or rarely has my senses prove me wrong. I think you are avoiding me, haha......For wat reason, I think I know. Noticed that u don't look into my eyes when I'm talking to u or maybe I'm hallucinating. Still some things are better left unsaid.

Well so be it then. Its not like I want anything from you. Bit by bit, I might no longer require my knee guard anymore. It seems like I'm at a 95% complete knee recovery. Soon there will be a league and this time I will dominate and show prowess !

* An injured then recovered lion's strike is unstoppable * Once they started chasing, they won't stop until their prey is completely dead in its track.

Dramatic Last Few Days

2009-01-18T08:22:00.000-08:00

2 days ago, I met some bloke who introduced me really neat stuffs into filming but it wasn't by chance. It was total pure hardwork as i scoured the city from West to Central to East to find a suitable filming video cams & lights

Then he introduced me "SINEMA OLD SCHOOL". Next day I went to watch a local romance movie by myself believing no one would bother accompanying me. Well my primary objective was met, which was to mix around with local film scene. I spoke to this talented younger than me director/producer. My secondary objective would soon be met. After all, I was from the sales line :P pitching with passion shouldn't be a problem I guess.

Also today I spent a fukin busy day trying to clear broken tiles in my living room, did I mention it was like a war zone with debris n rubble all over. How unlucky especially when its chinese new year and worser when u wanna invite friends over for the 1st time.... But then I went on polish up my to swordsmanship like posta de donna, posta longuard and some instabil drills. ( italian names)

Last but not least, I will not allow u to hinder my goals n dreams. I fell deep enough last year and you are but just a passing shadow !

2009 A Fresh Start

2009-01-08T10:11:00.000-08:00

For starters, a new blog for a new year and for a new drive within.
Goodstuffs:
1) I believe my knee cap finally recovered after a real bad 7 month long injury
2) I'm getting more serious in school work and being on time
3) I'm angry at something and it gives me alot of strength & power & adrenaline to tone back my body. I mean it
4) I'm dead serious abt getting my driving license now

Neutral:
1) I don't even know its good or bad, I watched "Yes Man" today and discovered too much of myself in the role Jim Carrey was acting.

Badstuffs:
1) I gotta step out of my comfort zone ; ;
2) I got a feeling, I'm giving u false hope. I'm sorry